Grace

“Grace is not opposed to effort, it is opposed to earning. Earning is an attitude. Effort is an action. Grace, you know, does not just have to do with forgiveness of sins alone.” 
― Dallas Willard, The Great Omission: Reclaiming Jesus's Essential Teachings on Discipleship

Grow

3 Ways to Help Grow the Emotional Bond in Marriage

The emotional bond of a relationship is the glue.  When things seem to start to come unglued look at the rhythm of these areas and see how you are doing.  

Debbie and I have been married for thirty-two years.  When life seems stressful these areas get out of rhythm.  I begin to get to busy or we have the stress of transitions.  Things like kids schedules or kids graduating and leaving home or aging parents have all caused these areas to change rhythm, and it took work to make it beautiful again.    

I have listed a condensed version of the areas below.  I will develop a more complete picture of each of these in future posts.  

1. Shared experiences - How often do you spend time without electronics where you laugh, play, encourage, affirm and non-sexually touch? These are the characteristics of time together that produce the inner feelings we call intimacy.  These experiences could be everything from a wonderful date night to just cuddling on the sofa watching your favorite show.  You have to have time together.  
2. How you part and How you greet - You should part from each other each day as you leave for work or activities with warmth, touch and encouragement.  Not screaming “by” from across the house. You should greet each other after being gone with the joy that a Golden Retriever greets you without peeing on the floor.  
3. Focus on the positive not the negative - When we feel disconnected or unhappy we focus on the negative.  We only see what is bad and believe if only we could fix the negative all of life would be better.  This makes the negative cycle run faster. Each day you need to work at trying to identify and acknowledge the positive in your spouse.  As you end your day ask yourself was I more positive or negative to my spouse today. If you can’t remember times that you were intentionally positive you were most likely unintentionally negative.  This starts with the intentional effort of being positive.  

Marriage is described as work.  I have come to realize the work of marriage is compromise and connection.  Have your tried some version of the things I have suggested to stay connected, or have you found others way to connect?

I am Speaking at The Journey Ministries men's retreat May 1-3, 2014. The retreat is based on the writing of John Eldredge.  It is a great experience geared for the busy man that wants some time with the Lord and great experiences with other guys.  You can register online at the website.  This is a ministry that I have written several blog posts for and speak at their retreats I would encourage you to follow them online.

About two months ago, we began to have problems with our computers.  Our computer maintenance technician came to the center and informed us that our server was beginning to deteriorate and would need to be replaced as soon as possible to keep our computer system running.
Five years ago, we were able to purchase the computers that we have now with a grant from a local foundation. We decided to submit another grant request to the same foundation. The foundation encouraged us to raise $1,000 of this expense on our own. My hope is to raise more.
If we are not granted the request from the foundation, we will need to raise at least $2,500 to replace just the server. Would you please prayerfully consider helping us meet this need?
Please be in prayer for us as we seek funds for this equipment update.
Thanks so much 
God Bless,

We did it

We completed the run in 4 hours. Sore muscles but proud that we both could complete. 

40000 of my closest freinds

We decided to come to Nashville for a run this morning.

Getting Registered

We had fun at the expo.